Dinner At Browns On Lonsdale Is A Washout

So, this is a beautiful day. It’s My 5^th wedding anniversary and I have taken the day off of work (Thanks Jag!) and spent it with my beautiful wife. Plans for dinner are simple. More than twice, someone has spoken of Browns Restaurant & Bar as a good place to go. We dine at an excellent Greek restaurant called Mythos regularly and see Browns across the street and have spoken about it a couple of times so we decided to go and try if for our anniversary dinner. We clean up a bit and hail a cab to take us there for a 6 o’clock reservation and I pack a Leon Jimenes No. 5 to smoke on the walk home. All in all, I’d say things are shaping up nicely for a fine Friday night out, and a great steak dinner…

Boy, was I wrong…We arrive on time, and are seated promptly. (phew) It looks like our booth table is nice and roomy, eye-lines to everyone else are limited so it feels private enough. The noise level is there, but not obnoxiously loud, so we are doing ok. A server promptly addresses us, and then checks in a couple of times in the span of 10 minutes which is nice. I can see we won’t have to wait and I am happy for the service.

Jo-Anne ponders a vodka with 7-Up, and a shot of cranberry juice, and then orders one. I inquire about a bourbon, and after the waitress excuses herself to go check the selection, she returns immediately to advise me that they only have Jack Daniels. Now where I come from, JD is a Tennessee Whiskey, not a bourbon whiskey. It is similar to bourbon, but due to it’s charcoal filtering, it becomes a distinctly different drink. I clarified to her that Jack Daniels is not Bourbon Whiskey, thus I will have a Corona instead. Menu looks good, but Jojo notices that if one is not looking for something with seafood in it, the size of the menu shrinks considerably quickly. She opts for a burger.

I do not need to spend a lot time with a selection. I eat steak. I eat steak everywhere I go. So the choice is quick. The steaks are divided by the cut, and then refined by sauces. I choose a char-grilled steak with no sauce compliment. I don’t do peppercorn, etc…

Our order is taken, drinks are checked, and we note the smell emanating from the open kitchen (as was noted in this review. Fish oil was our consensus. While we wait, I eyeball my steak on a grill in the kitchen and ponder its taste… mmmmmm

Finally the moment arrives. Our waitress brings our meal and apologizes to Jo-Anne as she had ordered some of the Peppercorn sauce with her mushroom burger and the waitress clarified that she would bring it in a dish on the side so Jojo can apply at will to her burger.

There is no side dish. The peppercorn has found its way onto my steak.

This is ok. A communication error has occurred and as I am a programmer I have certainly seen this before. Now the waitress gets a look on her face of “please just accept our mistake, and all will be well in my world” but alas. I am enjoying my 5^th anniversary and will wait for the kitchen to prepare another steak. I advise the waitress of the fact that I do not want peppercorn and smile. She smiles and takes away the plate of food and I happily wait for another to be prepared.

Less than 4 minutes later, lo and behold, a 15 minute steak meal has been redone. My first thought was that the waitress has snookered someone else’s medium-rare steak and passed it forward to me. but I really need to inquire as only one of two things could have happened here and I want to make sure that she gets a good tip for the consideration if this was the case. I inquire and she promptly replies

“the cook has removed the sauce”.
“Removed?” I say, with my happy feelings sliding away like snot on a 2 year old’s nose…
“Yes, the cook has washed it.”
“umm. Pardon?”
“The cook ran it under hot water to remove the sauce and says it does nothing to the flavor”
“It should be fine. :)”

pause…..

blink

Now in this very second, I almost believe her. I am still processing what she is saying so I advise her I will take a taste. I slice off a piece and take a bite.

My steak dinner has been cooked, washed and served to me. I don’t actually know at this moment what to say. I am stumped. Me, whose has a mouth like a race car with a broken muffler has not a word…

I muster a “no this is no good at all” at which point she realizes the sum of events which has just taken place, and whisks away my “Steak-al-a-Aqua” to the kitchen with a horrified look.

Jo-Anne I think giggled a bit at all of this transpiring in front of her and I reminisce in this moment at the look on her face as I tried my “water washed steak”.

The waitress, obviously realizing that this situation will need corrections, speaks to her manager who comes to our table and apologizes for this unfortunate incident, advises me that this steak dinner will be paid for by the restaurant and then goes directly to the kitchen and has a talk with one of the 20 yr. old-ish cooks who is now preparing my 2^nd steak dinner. She talks to him for a couple of minutes and then disappears from view.

My first Corona was consumed in the wait for the 1^st steak, so during the mêlée at my table of steak coming and going, and then apologies coming and going, I was offered another drink. I gladly accepted as I was to be waiting another 15 minutes. So I sit and wait. No food and no drink.

Eventually Jo-Anne flags down our waitress and she apologizes again and rolls her eyes as if to indicate the stupidity of another server for not delivering a drink to me and goes to get my Corona. She returns and says that she is buying me this beer and I thank her for that.

I eventually get my steak dinner, my cigar, and a memorable anniversary with my wife, who is at this moment reminding me that her intention in having me blog this tonight was not intended as permission for me to spend the night at my computer…..

I will leave you with my opinion. Unless washing a fine steak dinner in a commercial kitchen sink is something you are fine with, Don’t eat at Browns!…